February Thoughts

"February arrives cold, wet and gray, her gifts disguised for only the most discerning spirits to see. Gratitude is the thread we weave into the fabric of our daily lives this month, giving thanks for our simply abundant lives and asking for the gift of one thing more:grateful hearts." by Sarah Ban Breathnach book Simple Abundance A Daybook of Comfort and Joy-
February's chapter introduction.
I read this book each day last year, before bed, just one or two pages. Much of what Sarah wrote rang very true for me...not all, but enough that it it made me think long and hard about many of the things I did on a daily basis...some little, some very big. It gave me the courage and conviction to act differently....for the better...for me as a person and for those I come in contact with. So, I decided that I would read it again this year to see how it will change my thinking even more.
It was a blue weekend.....not only was I still not feeling well with a bad cold but I learned that the husband of a long time friend passed away at the age of 52. He passed away at home, as were his wishes, with his family close at hand. His wife and I started our first "real" jobs together, had babies together, shared many hobbies, many good times. He spent years of winter weekends with my husband out in the bush cutting trees to keep us warm all winter in our wood heated homes, and so on. As our kids grew, jobs changed and so on, we grew apart but could always get together and pick up as if no time had passed. I am shocked at how quickly he went downhill after radiation therapy that did not work. Everyone thought he was handling his battle with cancer so well. I was glad the sun was shining and the day warmed up considerably -the kind of winter day he would have loved. I am sad that a good man had to leave this earth too soon. Cancer is such an insidious disease -I've lost both parents, friends and relatives to it and it has changed the lives so completely of my sister, a survivor, and again so many others. Today I am grateful to have known my friend, to have shared so much. I am so grateful that I still have my soul mate with me...I can't imagine life without him.